Friday, June 15, 2012

The Path Less Traveled

It’s Friday – the day where I join other bloggers and take five short minutes to just write from the heart. Five Minute Friday is hosted by Gypsy Mama and this week’s prompt is PATH.

In 2001, I was faced with a dilemma. For me, there were two paths I could take and I took the one less traveled......

When I chose to place my second son, Charlie, in an open adoption directly following his birth, I knew there would be lots of loss but I didn’t realize there would be gains as well. Because I chose that path, I became part of a community of people, the adoption community more importantly the birthmother community that I never would have been a part of if it weren’t for that choice.

I met Lani, (often referred to as my BFF on this blog) my very best, dearest friend because of adoption. She is, as she so eloquently puts it, “the sister God let me choose.” Had I not chosen the path of adoption, I wouldn’t have her in my life and that makes her very sad.

Honestly, many of my closest, dearest friends are other birthmothers and had I not chosen adoption my paths probably never would have crossed theirs.

The heart ache I initially felt after placing Charlie into the arms of his adoptive parents is what led me to find my writing voice again and what led Lani and I to start BirthMom Buds. Writing and BirthMom Buds have helped me feel useful and given me another purpose in life.

Does all of that make the hole in my heart from relinquishing Charlie smaller? No absolutely not! But it has made the path more bearable. 


  1. Amen, sistah. I love you and the other birth mothers I've met because I took the path less traveled too. You are amazing!

  2. Coley, you have touched my heart! The burden you have carried has helped to shape you into the woman you are today! We all must make hard decisions in our lives. You made the best of an extremely difficult situation and have found support that has eased it some along the way. we indeed lighten our load when we share one another's burdens along the path.

  3. So true Coley!!! Love you sweetie!

  4. Coley, I agree completely!!! Love u sweetie! So blessed to call you a friend :-)