Charlie's 9th Birthday

Nine years ago today a little boy was born. He taught me the lesson of loving someone so much you let them go because it is the best thing for them.  

Happy birthday, Charlie! I love you!

Charlie's School Christmas Play

On Monday I went to Charlie's school with him, his Mom, and his sister to watch his 2nd grade Christmas Play.

Charlie was so excited about the play and kept saying "it's my FIRST play." My favorite part was when he talking about how his teacher was saying that each child is a star in the play and he busts out with "Mo-i is the star of the show." 

(That's Moi said in 2 syllables - funny!)

The play was titled "Elfis (yep, like Elvis) and the Sleigh Riders." The whole thing was like a 50/60's feel complete with dancing and music from that time just made Christmasy. The girls wore poodle skirts but instead of donning poodles on the skirts, each skirt had an appliquéd reindeer. It was really cute. 

Charlie was an elf and had a lot of lines (at least it seemed like a lot of lines for a second grader to me!) and he did great. At the very end, he bowed. He was the ONLY child who bowed. It was adorable. 

Waving Hi to me and his Mom in the 2nd row

Hamming it up "on set" after the show

Eight Today

Charlie is 8 years old today! Happy 8th Birthday Charlie!

My 15 Minutes

Recently I was interviewed by an Associated Press reporter from New York for an article about Birthmother’s Day. Apparently she had been given my name and contact information from several others in the adoption community as a good resource for her article.  Originally I thought he article was just going to contain a quote or two from me about Birthmother’s Day but during our interview she began asking questions about my personal adoption situation. Although the main focus of the article is still Birthmother’s Day and does include two other birthmothers. They also decided that they’d like a photograph of me, Charlie, and Angee (Charlie’s adoptive Mom) to run with the article so they sent an Associated Press photographer here for a mini “photo shoot.” He got some great shots and I got some really good ones afterwards.  The article “hit news stands” last week and it’s in a lot of different newspapers and publications all over the United States including some big ones like The LA Times, The Boston Globe, and The Atlanta Journal Constitution. I’ve actually lost track of how many different publications it has been in at this point and I know it will still be running through the weekend. It’s been overwhelming!  One funny thing – they misspelled Lani’s (my BFF and co-founder of BirthMom Buds) last name. They spelled it Dowling when it’s actually Downing so that part has been funny as I keep referring to Lani Dowling as her new alias. 

I’ve done interviews in the past and have been misquoted so I was kind of nervous about this one, especially since it was going to be all over the US. But I’ve been pleased with this article for the most part! 

Here’s the portion of the article about me, Lani, and BirthMom Buds…. The journey of "coming out" as a birthmother is a painful one, she said, but the Internet has done wonders to ease the way for both adoptees and bbirthmothers looking to access documents or just meet others for support. Nicole "Coley" Strickland of Boiling Springs, S.C., found fellow birthmother Lani Dowling in Atlanta, Ga., that way after blindly searching for support soon after giving birth to a boy in 2001 and placing him with a couple she met at the restaurant where she was a waitress. Two years later, Strickland and Dowling founded Birthmombuds.com, which has 900 registered users around the country. The two send out care packages to new birthmothers, pair up buddies living close to each other and host regular chats for birthmoms online. They also coordinate Birth Mother's Day events every year. While details for this year's events are still firming up, gatherings are planned in New York City, Los Angeles, Seattle, Nashville and areas of Oregon, North Carolina, New Hampshire and Ohio, among other states. For birthmoms who don't live near one of the gatherings or don't feel comfortable in a group setting, Strickland, 32, suggests they make Mother's Day a little easier by writing something about _ or for _ their relinquished children, lighting a candle, planting a tree or donating a book to a library in their honor. "It really does give us a time to bond with other birthmoms," said Strickland, who has regular visits with her now 7-year-old as part of an open adoption. "We feel a lot of the same things at the same time. We need to be there for each other." And last but not least, here's a few of the photos I took after the AP photo shoot.....

Noah and Charlie

Me, Noah, and Charlie

Charlie, Noah, and Natalie (Charlie's sister via adoption)

Group Shot - Charlie, Noah, Natalie, Jason, and Me (I took this one with my camera on the tripod using the timer and the kids thought me running to jump in the picture was hilarious!)

Charlie's 7th Birthday

Today is Charlie's (my birthson) birthday! It's hard to beleive that he is seven years old. It seems like only yesterday I was holding him as a tiny baby in the hospital preparing to let him go.

Over the seven years that I have been Charlie's birthmother my life has changed drastically. I was given a second chance and I have sincerely tried to make the most of that second chance. I've tried to be the best Mom to Noah and an advocate for birthmothers. While I know placing Charlie for adoption was the best choice I could make at that time in my life, that doesn't mean that my heart doesn't ache at times. Birthdays are bittersweet. I usually get to spend time with Charlie and his family on his actual birthday. This is the first year we haven't been able to do that. Charlie's Mom's best friend's husband (that's a mouth full!) died and the visitation was last night and funeral today so it just didn't work out to get together today. A (Charlie's Mom) wanted to try and get together tomorrow evening but I'm afraid that will mess up Noah's routine too much and (I hope this come out the wrong way) he is my priority. She may try and re-arrange things so we could get together Sunday afternoon but I'm not getting my hopes up in case it doesn't work out. If nothing else, I'll see Charlie next weekend for his birthday party. Happy Birthday Charlie! (Photo taken on Charlie's 6th birthday)